Why Queers Hate Queens.

First off, this is sort of a response blog to my friend Chris who wrote a piece called “Why do Queers Hate Queens?”. I was really compelled by it because it raised a lot of issues that I’ve noticed myself. What does it mean to be gay? Many people, especially gays, feel like if you aren’t wearing your sexuality on your sleeve and completely living your life solely to be a gay man you’re self-hating and trying to act straight. So what if you’re just not that queeny, and like to date like-minded guys?

Most queers hate queens because they’re ANNOYING. They’re loud, most aren’t funny, and they’re shoved down our throats in every gay bar or gay event. I think the defining point is what kind of “queen” are you? Are you genuinely who you are or is it a show? Most people who are considered Queens, be them androgenous, flamboyant, or full on performing Drag Queens are hungry for attention and live their lives as a show, they aren’t true to themselves or anyone else. Sure it’s entertainment, and there is something to be said for people who live their lives as entertainment.

Hence, Queens are a joke because they live their lives as a joke. They don’t dress or act like real men or women, most just act like a BAD caricature of ghetto ethnic women. They’re starved for attention and use their sexuality, probably the only significant segment of their personality to get it, and it doesn’t matter if that attention is negative or positive as long as their getting it. To not see them as a joke in some form is to say David Sedaris writes serious, classically derived novels. I mean sure I flame out at times, my hag says my bff and I act like teenage latino girls when we’re together but I realize there is a time and a place for everything.

I think a big factor in this is when flamboyant guys are asked to “act straight” what the person usually means to say is “act right”. Personally I don’t like going places with someone I know is going to act a fool or draw attention unless I want attention, and most “queens” have no grasp of the concepts of “low key” or “situation appropriate”. When in Rome you don’t insist everyone else change to fit your life; if a person can’t be pliable to different social settings what does that say about them as a person? We are who we are, our personalities are what they are, but society is what it is and one can’t expect it to change because they aren’t comfortable or it isn’t accommodating.

As sad as it may be society, even our own gays, clump anyone that deviates from the sexual norm as “queens”. I’ve really noticed though that attractiveness is relative to location, gay men in Texas tend to like manly men and shun anyone flamboyant as guys in New York or San Francisco seem to have a broader spectrum of what they find attractive. Personally I tend to like masculine guys more so I guess I fall into that Texas mold, but that has to do with my personal tastes. It’s like being at a buffet. When I walk by the oven baked salmon it doesn’t appeal to me at all. It looks disgusting. It doesn’t spark my apatite at all, but as I pass it by some other buffet patron comes through and scoops up a triple helping. We’re all like dishes in the buffet. Everyone, no matter how cold they’ve begun to turn, has someone out there waiting for a triple helping.

Personally being Justin Thyme is my #1 priority. I am myself, I don’t define my personality by my sexuality, that’s just a side order and I don’t like to date guys that do either. Sure I use it as a basis for a lot of comedy but I’m no one-trick pony.